walk it off

I knew that it was going to be a long day when my first email of the morning contained a request that was so breathtakingly idiotic that I needed a minute. Actually, I needed more than a few minutes. I had to rewrite my response several times and then take a walk from my desk to think it over before I sent back an unforgivably rude response. My first response was scathing on purpose, but when I tried to rewrite it in more neutral terms, I struggled to find the words that would avoid saying what I really thought.

For the most part, I am blessed with enlightened clients. Even the ones that don't believe in cultivating a mutually helpful and beneficial relationship are at least reasonable in their behavior. This one client, however, is stubborn as a mule and possibly shares a similar I.Q.. How does one explain gravity to such a person without sounding scornful or patronizing? Seriously, the request sent by her would only be thought feasible if one was not familiar with the law of gravity. I believe we were officially introduced to Newton's Law of Universal Gravitation in seventh grade, though we were probably aware of it previous to the science class introduction. Well, most of us were aware of gravity but apparently not all.

And so I still struggle with how to formulate a response that explains why water will not be flowing uphill without coming off as disbelieving of her intelligence when in fact I am.

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